Author: Peter Carlisle

Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching TV and drinking a beer when he hears a knock at the door. When he opens it, he is confronted by a little Chinese man, clutching a clipboard and yelling, “You sign! You sign!” Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts. Nelson is standing there […]

Possible names for Liverpool’s new stadium What about the Nou Cam-down?” (You’ve got to say it in a scouse accent to get it – Ed) How about the Dey-do-dough-don’t-dey Dome? The Stadium of Lightfingers, anyone? If you received any decent jokes or interesting trivia by email recently, send it on to us.

1. The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; “7” was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. “UP” indicated the direction of the bubbles. 2. Mosquito repellents do not repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito’s sensors so they do not know you are there. 3. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept […]

This is one of the best blooper ads we’ve seen, it demonstrates what can happen when companies outsource their ads to foreign countries in order to cut costs. Someone who is ESL (English as a second language) wrote the copy l ine for this ad (see below). The little firemen coming out of the bottle […]

ARCHITECTS ESTIMATE: The cost of construction in heaven MANAGEMENT CONTRACT: The technique for losing your shirt under perfect control COMPLETION DATE: The point at which liquidated damages begin LIQUIDATED DAMAGES: A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible QUANTITY SURVEYORS: People who go in after the war is lost and bayonet the wounded LAWYERS: People […]